Saturday, January 23, 2010

I see your future

I check my emails as I do every morning, and see the usual; my horoscope, a middle of the night reply from SDG on something I emailed her the day before, spam, more spam and a message from some psychic that I forgotten I'd even signed up for.

I check what the psychic has to say. According to her my relationship is about to end. That's funny as I am totally single. Have been for the last 3 years. Well, okay 3 one night stands and an internet f**k buddy doesn't really count, I am still single.
Anyway, this email from the psychic goes on about how she did my chart and sees some big uber badness about to hit my relationship and that my partner (god forbid they say husband or lover in these things) is on the brink of leaving me if I don't pull my head out of my ass.
All this from my birthday, which she copied wrong anyway. My birthday is March 22 and she has it listed on this email as the 20th. God, even in cyber space my head space is messed up and I'm overlooked.

This is serious business folks for just $45.99 I can have this unmet psychic cast my full chart and tell me just when the planets will be in the proper spot for me to grab a hold of the power they wish to give me smoothing out all my troubles.

Or you know, for less then $20 I can buy "The only Astrology book You will ever Need" the revised second edition, and cast my own charts. Which I have been doing for 12 years now. Okay, not really cast my charts as much as looking up what planet is where on what day then cross referencing the meaning of that planet. Yes I study Astrology as a hobby. If you want to call it that. I am a horoscope junkie.

Back to the emails. SDG is in a bad mood by the looks of things. She's only answering in single lined sentences. This is going to be a less then fun day dealing with her.

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